Dear Xbox Three-Sixty

You have suffered much in my hands.

Oh, sure. It started out all sunshine and roses, an easy life, living day to day with just a small handful of games, sharing my attention with the Wii. Life was easy. You were new and shiny, young and invincible.

But all that would change. I would taste the sweet nectar of Live. One free weekend for all Silver Members. So much changed in those few hours. I became addicted, needing more. I bought a One Year Gold subscription and dusted off my old games. I had never played the multiplayer stuff before, now it was all I yearned for. Like any good narcotic (or so I'm told), the more I played, the more I wanted.

But it was Burnout Paradise that got you all hot and bothered, and left me in the cold. At first, I thought it was a random glitch in the matrix, a graphical error that caused a console freeze. But I quickly learned the truth. You were dying inside. It was only a matter of time.

I sent you away. They told me they would make you better, return you to me as if it had never happened. And they did. I remember the day I got that phonecall that you were home. I opened the package to see you lying there. It was you, not a replacement. I could tell by your serial number.

We've had some great times since then. You were always good to me. You soldiered through long nights of Rock Band with friends, twelve hour marathon sessions of the newest release or hours upon hours of watching TV shows and movies. We reached over 30,000 Gamerscore together, just you and me, dozens of games, an internet connection, Xbox Live Gold, days and weeks of playtime... ok. Maybe a bit more than just you and me, but all through you.

I even brought you to Canada. After all those years, I could never dream of leaving you behind.

For a while, you sat there waiting. Waiting. Wondering when I would show you the same attention you had been used to. Then September 20th arrived and it was just like old times. I was running you through your paces again, every evening when I got home, long, intense sessions at the weekends, not only running the game, but sometimes hosting, Party chatting and downloading all at once.

It was to be expected, really. The first time I saw those two red segments light up your face, I paused. I refused to see the truth. I told myself that you just needed dusting. It didn't help. I moved you to a new, brighter location. It didn't help.

Now I have you sitting on my sill, beside an open window. You remain cool and comfortable, sucking in the Vancouver November air. For now.

But I know it's coming. I know our time runs short. Now I cherish every moment. I don't want to start playing a new game in case that will be the one that finishes it.

I just don't want it to end yet.

Your owner forever,

Denis.

The Coalitions Finest

Gears of War 3 has taken up residence in my Xbox almost exclusively since it's launch in September. Apart from hacking and slashing my way through the dungeons of Torchlight and rocking out to the Coldplay pack for Rock Band 3, I've been investing an extraordinary amount of time in the third game in Epic Games' console flagship series.

My first experience of Gears of War was via the second installment. Aidan and Rob had bought the steroid abusing sci-fi action shooter and invited me to try out this new game mode called Horde.

From Wave one, I was hooked. Team based co-operative multiplayer with no competitive element! Wave after wave of inhuman enemies in steadily increasing numbers and difficulty, this was pure survival gameplay balancing edge-of-your-seat tension with frantic and cinematic firefights.

My love of Horde was so great in fact that I pointedly ignored what I thought was surely a terrible, machismo, testosterone filled, steroidal, brain dead campaign. By the time I did get around to playing it, I knew how to defeat every enemy it threw at me, apart from the bosses. This somewhat robbed me of experiencing the terror of the bullet absorbing Sires, as I already knew to simply walk around the area with my chainsaw permanently revved up!

Going into Gears 3, I promised myself that I'd get the campaign finished before trying out Horde 2.0 or the new mode, Beast. Once the surprises of the story were out of the way, I was eager to jump into my favourite gameplay mode in it's newest incarnation.

Horde has seen a vast and sweeping overhaul since it's appearance in the second game. Now you earn cash for kills, and can buy fortifications, ammo boxes or weapons across the map space. Way back when this was first announced I was a little apprehensive that they had messed with a good thing. Horde was great because it was so clean. Just you and up to four friends versus 50 waves of Locust creatures looking to decorate their fireplaces with your skulls. Nothing else.

But the new additions not only work, they work spectacularly. Earlier I called Horde Mode "pure survival gameplay balancing edge-of-your-seat tension with frantic and cinematic firefights". Horde 2.0 adds heart pounding building, repairing and upgrading of all too often meager defenses to help you survive the rising flood of enemies. The fortifications further encourage team-work, as people co-ordinate to maximise the work done in the short time they have between Waves. Players can even share cash with each other if they wish to, although while I have seen this used occasionally in private games with friends, I have yet to witness it during a random match-up over Xbox Live.

One of the best additions to Horde 2.0 however has to be the Wave 10 Bosses. Horde is still played as 50 Waves broken into five 10 Wave sets. In the first version, this meant that the number and difficulty of the enemies per Wave steadily increased up to Wave 10, where we were terrified of Bloodmounts, before resetting to the enemies of Wave 1 again for Wave 11, but making them tougher. Horde 2.0 makes that 10th Wave even more fun by giving it a random Boss, from a choice of about seven or eight. The bosses are usually bigger and badder than anything else in the mode, and standard tactics for almost every one of them is to take out all the regular enemies while avoiding the Boss characters until they are the only things left, and then combatting them. Standard tactics usually result in death. Non-standard tactics however, focusing fire on the Boss characters first and then the little guys, just results in additional iterations of the Boss character appearing. If there is anything worse than dealing with a Burmak, it's seeing its twin brother step out from the smoke of the exploding first one.

Horde kept me playing Gears of War 2 much longer than I have played any other shooter to date. Through it I made some great friends over Xbox Live, and enjoyed many frantic and hilarious moments of both victory and defeat. Horde 2.0 has successfully improved on the original design, and I know I'll be playing it for months, if not years, to come.

Just Plain Talented

After far too many months of waiting, Gears of War 3 took its first steps into the public light at 2am this morning, Vancouver time. Naturally, as a Gears fan since playing Horde mode for the first time at a friends house, I stayed up to get in on the action at the first opportunity. Equally as obvious, Claire stayed up with me to watch the first few minutes before tottering off to dreamland.

The Gears of War Beta allows us fans to experience an early build of the multiplayer, putting the maps and weapon balances to the test. It's only a Beta, so most of the final content that will appear on the disc is not available, and I'm not just referring to the single player campaign. My favorite more, the previously mentioned Horde Mode is not featured, nor is the new gameplay type I'm most looking forward to trying out, Beast Mode.

This first week is for BulletStorm owners and Epic Games friends and family only, and the options available are limited. Currently, there is only one game mode and two maps available, though more will be released over the course of the four weeks the Beta runs for. First up, the maps.

Checkout: This is set inside a ruined supermarket. It is very close quarters combat orientated, with lots of destructible cover and low walls to both crouch behind, but also mantel over and stomp enemies. The rows of shelving give loads of ways to get around opponents and create cross fire opportunities, as well as quickly splitting up uncoordinated teams. The lighting on this map is beautiful, with sunlight streaming through frosted of grimy glass, brightening everything. But we'll get back to that later.

Thrashball: Set in a destroyed thrashball arena from the pre-war days. This is a big, open central area with small side areas for bottlenecked combat. One major issue I have with this map is that it appears to be possible to spawn-camp a team - the spawn zone has one tunnel exit (like a team dressing room exit to the pitch) and if you get forced back to there you're pretty much boned. This happened once to my team last night. When that doesn't happen though, it's a great fun map. The grass and plant-life that has reclaimed the arena are bright and lush, a noticeable departure from the browns and grays more common in the previous games.

Play alternates between the two maps per match, not per round. As I stated earlier, currently there is only one game mode available. While Team Deathmatch is nothing new to shooters in general, it is new to the Gears franchise, and their version puts a Gears style spin on things. Each team has a pool of 15 respawns. The object of the lesson is to kill the enemy team enough times to deplete their pool, then eliminate them. This means that four great players stuck with one sucky player could lose if said sucky player dies a lot and runs though the pool[1]. It also means one player could potentially be the last remaining player on his team and still cream the enemy with skillful use of the shotgun, going on to win for his team[2].

My opinion on competitive multiplayer shooters in general: I play Gears for Horde. I love the cooperative gameplay, the team work, the shared joy of victory and the shared exhilaration of defeat. There are no hard feelings when we die to the Horde waves. No one calls "cheater" or, "unfair advantage". No one accuses the opponents of host advantage, or the game of having unbalanced weapons. But I've never played a competitive multiplayer session that lasted more than a few rounds before those accusations were flying across the chat channels. And the Beta was no different. When my team was winning, this was "the best game ever", and this map was "so balanced" and everything was "great". When same team was loosing, the other team was "clearly cheating" and the maps were "unfair" and the shotgun was "so overpowered" and yadda, yadda, yadda. Sigh. I miss Horde already.

Based on my brief trip so far, here are my two top Pro Tips for the Beta:
1- Stick together as a team!! We lost more rounds by splitting up and running every which way than by opposing skill.
2- Learn when to ignore the voices in your head. When they're being nice and coordinating the offensive, then stay in contact, work as a team. When they're being offensive and complaining about the game, shut up and don't join in. You're better than that, and must accept that chances are you'll lose more than you'll win, especially at the start. Just focus on getting a few kills per game and you'll be fine.

Graphically, the game is beautiful, vivid and lush, with gorgeous lighting. One of the promises was to make everything brighter, and they have. Vivid colours, streaming sunshine. Everything looks amazing. From what I've seen, character models look nice too, but usually they're running about or getting stomped on, so it's hard to tell for sure. If you've played Enslaved, the Thrashball arena especially reminds me of those bright post-apocalyptic areas from that game (also built on the Unreal 3 engine), and the Checkout map reminds me of a brighter, easier to navigate and more interesting version of the supermarkets in Fallout 3.

Here are some stats from my first night playing. This might be especially useful for those of you interested in hoping to unlock the Beta exclusive Gold Lancer and Trashball Cole skins.

10 matches of Team Deathmatch took me approximately 2 hours and netted me 24 Rounds played, and a total of 22 kills with the Lancer alone (the required stat to watch for the Gold Lancer retail unlock), and many more kills in total. I unlocked a bunch of stuff, including weapon skins and Anya as a playable character for just playing the 10 matches.

I originally thought the retail unlock Gold Lancer requirements (Complete 90 matches in any game type to unlock for the Beta period. To permanently unlock, score 100 kills with the Gold-Plated Retro Lancer during the Beta period) were tough, but they seem like something that is going to happen anyway over the course of 4 weeks. Even over the 3 weeks most people have. Kill stealing is a bitch, but I've given as much as been taken, so it all balances out, right? Also, I'm generally ignoring Executions in favour of laying a few more rounds in my target to guarantee no-one else gets to him first.

And finally, the weapons. I'm gonna make this fast, as Claire just hit the shower, so I have access to the PC monitor the Xbox is currently plugged into. Here goes:

Lancer is lancer, gnasher shotgun is broken, retro lancer seems ridiculously inefficient compared to the modern version (terrible recoil, massive footprint), new shotgun is crazy powerful but takes an eon to reload, incendiary grenades are hilarious (melting surfaces), flash bang grenades cause stun, blinding white light and just seem more useful, new digger weapon (tunnels underground and past cover) is cool to see in action but I haven't had a chance to try it yet, mortar is the usual splash damage hilarity, grinder is same as always, and I haven't gotten my hands on the sniper rifle yet.

All in all, I'm loving the chance to get my hands on the game this early. The game modes that will be available over the course of the Beta period are not why I am even remotely interested in the final retail game, but they give me the opportunity to see some of the maps, weapons and gameplay tweaks that is ahead of me. I'll be playing as much of it as possible, all the while yearning for the peace and man-love happy times that is Horde mode, now with female skins![3]

[1] Me.
[2] Not me.
[3] Despite female playable characters, Claire has made it very clear that she will be remaining with Marcus as her ingame avatar of death-by-sniper. Can't blame her. Even after all these years, my man-crush on Baird remains as powerful as the first day I laid eyes on his goggles.

Many Faces Of Me

After posting some images of my Avatar in my last post, I was inspired to have a look at the many in-game avatars I've created. This is just a sampling of what I grabbed, and are missing some fun ones, in particular, my character from Saints Row 2.


From Left to Right:
Top: Rock Band 2, Fallout 3, Rainbow Six: Vegas 2, Guitar Hero: World Tour
Bottom: Rainbow Six: Vegas 2, Mass Effect, Guitar Hero: World Tour, Fallout 3

The top row R6:V2 character is my Snake Eyes inspired clothing, while the one on the bottom row is showing off the face underneath the mask.

Sorry for the appalling quality of the images that go into making this collage, but they're photographs taken of the image from my projector against my wall. If you look at the full, giant sized image, you can make out the individual pixels!!

10,000G, 100% PURE Class

Not that long ago I posted about reaching 1,000G in a game for the very first time.

Today, I announce my newest gaming achievement. Minutes ago, I reached the five-digit GamerScore! 10,000G.

I gotta admit, I never thought I'd see that number under my Gamer Tag! As I said when I reached 1,000G in Burnout, I wasn't very big into GamerScore until I went online. I think it also helped that I started hitting benchmarks, like the first thousand, and I began to realize just how close I was getting to the 10,000 mark, which lent an air or excitement to each new Achievement I unlocked. Once I was within just a few short points of the big round number, I decided that I wanted to hit it exactly, and searched around for some easily reached Achievements that would give me just the right amount. Conveniently, Saints Row 2 hand a few five and ten point Achievements that I had yet to unlock.

But while Saints Row 2 might have brought me up to the magic number, most recently it was PURE*, a quad bike racing game by Disney, that added a sizable chunk of GamerScore to my tally. Having played the demo months ago, I grabbed this while it was on sale in HMV. It's an awesome racing game, that kicks things up a notch with an incredible tricks system. The tracks are stunningly beautiful, and the character models are fantastically detailed. I love how the bikes and riders start fresh and clean at the beginning of every race, but slowly get covered in a layer of mud and dirt that seems genuinely realistic. The immerse quality of the game can best be defined by revealing that this is the first game in well over a decade that I have found myself leaning side-to-side around corners, or twisting the controller in odd ways as my bike leaps off the apex of a hill into the wild blue yonder! The odd faces I make, and the little yelps of pain only add to the experience. Playing it with an audience adds a further soundtrack of cheers, howls of laughter and gasps of horror, depending on the outcome of some particularly spectacular jumps. I was particularly impressed with the veracity of the locations when a friend called over, looked at one of the loading screens for the start of a race and accurately identified the location. In fact, he had been standing roughly when the image was taken from, and had used the cable car that was visible! Nice!

The game itself is incredibly fun to play. I'd be lying if I said it was difficult, but Disney have successfully walked the thin line that separates easy from hard to create a game that remains fun right through to the end. I managed to get first place in every race fairly easily, but I enjoyed every minute of it.

One of the cooler aspects of the game is the bike creation feature. You get to build your own bikes, with an incredible ten slots to unlock and fill in your garage! Everything can be altered and customised, from performance affecting parts like the frame or engine, to purely aesthetic features, such as the grips, nerf bar or mudguards. Noel, Bob and Chris have all designed bikes for me, each with their own unique take on how I should use them. In all cases, I have gone on to use their bikes over my own! Chris designed a killer stunt track ATV, Bob's bike is great for races, proving that red truly does go faster, while Noels PaleHorse is the perfect all-rounder!

With such great gameplay, amazing graphics, beautiful locations and crystal clear commitment to fun, PURE is a game no racing enthusiast should be without. Seeing the Disney brand on the cover might turn some people off, but this is no Avatar! You earn your Achievements, and it feels great when you do. I pumped the air so often while playing this game I think I strained a shoulder muscle!

That, or I'm just having sympathetic pains for all those times I landed my onscreen rider head-first into the track.

* - I linked to a review of PURE on Xbox 360 Achievements instead of the official homepage, as the games site is entirely Flash based and immediately starts playing sound and music once it loads up. If you'd like to visit the official homepage, just click here. Just remember, you have been warned.

Since Last We Met

It's been a busy few weeks. With Christmas just around the corner, I should be decorating the house, buying Christmas presents, writing a tonnes of "Thank You" cards for all those that wished us well after our wedding (at this rate you'll get your one bundled with the "Thank You For The Baby Gift"!), organising a "Thank You" party for the friends who are waiting for their "Thank You" cards(oh yeah.... I still haven't posted the story of us getting married... hopefully I'll do that some time before 2009!), planning where to spend Christmas, deciding what to do for New Years, deciding what to do with myself in the next 12 months, and so much more.

Instead, I've been playing Xbox.

Fallout 3 has sucked up over 50 hours of my life according to the in-game clock, but that doesn't include the times I've reloaded an earlier save to redo a decision I was unhappy with, or all the time I've spent just talking about it with friends. I love how many different versions of the same events people have. "I did this and pick-pocketed him and got this!" "Really? I did this, talked to her, sneaked past him and got this!" "Wow." "That's nothing. I loaded up on shotgun shells, killed them all, and found all this!!" Stunned silence. "But... but... it was a commune of innocent old ladies..." "Bitches had bottlecaps." Awesome stuff.

I picked up Mirrors Edge cheap in a sale in town. I'm glad I did too. It's ok, but frustrating. I wish I'd started it on Easy Mode, as I have no patience for it now. I know that as soon as I get stuck in an area, I'm going to drop it and never go back to it.

In contrast, I borrowed The Force Unleashed off my brother, and started that on Easy Mode after getting sick of Fallout for a while. I thought it would be a nice diversion, running around hacking and slashing with my lightsabre, but I didn't think I'd get much value out of it. Instead, I got totally sucked into the story, pouring over each beautifully rendered cut-scene, enjoying the witty banter the Apprentice throws out, and really enjoying the game far more than I expected. I felt like I cheated myself out of some of the enjoyment by playing it on Easy. But it did mean that I got through the entire game in just a few hours, over two evenings, and got straight back into Fallout!

Thanks to Microsoft's generous offer of making online gaming free to everyone for one weekend, I also spent a lot of time playing Rainbow Six: Vegas 2 with Bob and Aidan. It was my first experience of the Live multiplayer, and we all really enjoyed it. So much so, that we're all going to start a 12 month Gold Membership within the next two weeks or so. That same weekend got me back into Burnout Paradise, and now I'm slowly pulling down the number of Wins required to get my Elite license. It sat above 100 for months, and it's now in the mid 80's... so... sometime before the Xbox 1080 is released I should have that done! Online Paradise is amazing, and loads and loads of fun either with friends I know in real life, or even just racing strangers! Crashing has never been so enjoyable.

And on top of all of those, I've been playing a little Call of Duty 4: Modern Warfare and Tom Clancy's: EndWar. Both games are a whole lot of fun, and deserve a lot more time than I've given to them so far, but I think they're going to wait until I've wrapped up Fallout and one or two others. Claire and I have also been enjoying playing the Xbox Arcade game Fable II Pub Games. Thankfully we don't have Fable II the game, as the town guards would be long after us at this point due to the massive debt we've accumulated! Fortunes Tower is a lot of fun, but frustrating, Spinner Box is the games own one-armed bandit, and we haven't really taken any time to learn where Keystone falls on the randomness scale. Most of our money has been won in Fortunes Tower tournaments, and lost in Fortunes Tower regular play!

Phew. I haven't played this much computer games in years. Hopefully it's just a phase, and in the New Year I can get back to being productive, doing lots of physical exercise, eating well, and writing the great Irish novel of the 21st Century.

Yeah.

I Get Excited When I Wii

Last Friday I picked up Wii Fit and dragged it home to try it out. I understand that Nintendo are encouraging an increase in exercising and all that through this game, but just getting it home was tiring enough! The thing weighs quite a bit!

Once home, I unpacked it carefully, synced it up with my machine, and started my all-new fitness regime. After some minor hiccups (I'm slightly over my ideal BMI), I was throwing myself around, avoiding panda bears and zooming off ski slopes! I even went jogging in my living room with Noel!

While the minigames are a lot of fun, it is the yoga exercises that I've enjoyed most. The balance board tracks your center of gravity, so it can tell you when you are going wrong, and help you achieve a good pose. As I know I have a bad posture, I've been focusing my efforts on the exercises that help that area, but I try to get a well-rounded workout. My shoulders are killing me from the push-ups, and my legs were shaking after a few stretching exercises a few minutes ago. My thighs burn, and my blood is pumping.

And I can do all this in my own home, with no beefcakes surrounding me, or no-one to see when I can't do that last push-up. But I still push myself. I'm doing more than I usually do, and I'm going to try to stay at it.

I've set myself a target to lose 1.5kg in two weeks. I thought I'd be ok, but this morning the game told me I've put on weight!! I didn't even have dinner yesterday!

New Year, New Stuff

Anyone who knows me, or even just reads this blog, knows I'm a die hard Nintendo fan, and nothing will ever steal my heart away. However, I'm not a console-monogamous fascist who thinks the competition are better used as paperweights by comparison (after all, if the PS3 was used as a paper weight, what would hold the door open?), and have had a second gaming console since the N64. My beloved DreamCast kept my Nintendo console company during both of their dying months. Together, they reminisced about better times. The N64 offered a comforting shoulder when Sega announced the dream was cast aside for their console department, instead shifting focus solely onto making games for their former competition. The DreamCast returned the support as Nintendo began to sink further and further behind the thundering power of Sony's newest offering, the seemingly invincible PS2. In fact, my DreamCast is still on my consoles table, ready to be plugged in and turned on at a moments notice. Unfortunately, it's been a while since I've enjoyed its cat and mouse delights now.

During the GameCube/PS2/Xbox era, my secondary console of choice was the Sony brand. By the time I picked one up it had a huge range of games available to it, as well as the added bonus of a DVD player. Lots of people had one, so swapping games was easy. At the same time, the Xbox was new to the game. It was huge, ugly (in my opinion), and had unwieldy controllers. Plus, it didn't enjoy nearly as large a market share as the PS2.

Back when the new generation of machines were still just rumours and here-say, my opinions on both companies offerings were unchanged. I had planned on the superior back catalogue of PlayStation games to be a deciding factor in my choice of console, and the Xbox 360 didn't sound all that great. I would continue my almost single-handed support of Nintendo and their wacky new ideas for a motion sensitive controller, even if I had few games to actually play on it, as I was sure no-one was seriously going to spend millions creating games that only worked for one console, exclusivity contracts or not.

But things change. The PS3 is beyond a joke, starting out with an ugly case design, and then removing one of it's biggest advantages by dropping backwards compatibility altogether! It is huge and expensive, and forces the added costs of Blu-Ray on the buyer, which, considering I'm not moving to any form of HD for the foreseeable future, only serves to annoy me more. Visually, the Xbox 360 is a beautifully designed machine, more so when you see the black Elite edition. It plays nice with my PC, allowing me to stream music directly, as well as playing movies from Claire's external hard-drive or the many, many burned DVDs I own. But the biggest shock of all (as much to the company itself as to the general public) is that the little console that could did! Nintendo's wonderful Wii is still selling faster than Nintendo can produce them some thirteen months after launch! What other console can claim the same fact? And the games that are available, while not able to display in high definition like it's competitors, are fun, entertaining and compulsive playing. Mario Galaxy is by far the best game I played in 2007, and Rayman Raving Rabbits 2 caused my house to miss New Years by two minutes because we just had to finish that last minigame!

So I'm happy with my Wii. It's awesome, fun, small, sexy, quiet and glows blue when turned on (just like I like my women!!...). The motion controls are clever, effective and, in the better games, they can be used to stunning effect. The possibilities are almost limitless, and not even Nintendo could have guessed some of the functions people are putting their unique console technology to (more on that in the next post). So if I only had the Wii, would I be happy? Yes. Definitely. Realistically, anything else I get to sit along-side it is just to play when I'm by myself. The Wii is the perfect party game, with some great single-player titles as well, but it's really at it's strongest with a group.

I was planning on getting an Xbox 360 in the sometime in 2008. Rainbow 6: Vegas is amazing fun (again, in multiplayer!), and Mass Effect was a draw from the first time I laid eyes on it. It's beautiful and an achievement in gaming. Despite saying that I had no interest in Assassins Creed some months ago, the closer it got to release, the better it looked. Three reasons to pick up a 360, one of which is exclusive. Add to that the downloadable content through Xbox Live, including demos, the play-nice factor with my PC and that at least four people I know really well got one as well, and the 360 became the console of choice for the newest generation of "Nintendo Support Machines".

So shortly before Christmas, I got one. It now sits on top of my sweet-but-cheap-but-really-great-and-thus-even-sweeter sound system. Well done Microsoft. Ya done good.

Now... anyone want to trade Xbox Live usernames? I currently have no friends... online!! I have loads in real life. We play Wii all the time.

Well Done Agent

This review is short and sweet.

I love it, some of my friends love it, some don't. A free-roaming sandbox game from the creator of the GTA series, Crackdown puts you in the place of a future cop with a crazy suit of armour that allows you to leap small buildings, pick up trucks, snipe with a heavy machine gun, and cause company cars to transform from G1 Transformers to Bayformers. Freakin' sweet! Admittedly, that's what you can do once you have leveled up a bit, but that really doesn't take very long. I was fully dotted before even starting the last of the three city zones.

I love the freedom, the leaping around, the crazy action, the pick-up-and-play aspect. I love the leveling up process, the cell shaded animation, and the sharp dialogue. I just love how much fun I find this game to be.

But I can't recommend it. You have to play it yourself. If you can, rent it, or even better, if you're on Xbox Live, just download the free demo. The leveling up speed has been ramped up so that you can almost max-out your athletics or weapons in the hour and a bit the demo allows you have. If you enjoy it, you can pick it up for about €25-€30 new, and €15-20 second hand. That's all it's really worth. Even I know when I get stuck into my other 360 title, even the colourful graphics and equally colourful gameplay won't pull me back. Though, as a rule of thumb, I'd say that if you enjoyed Hulk: Ultimate Destruction, you'll love this.

Galactic Conquest

I love playing computer games, but find anything that makes me too frustrated is not worth my time. Often, if I get stuck on a particular level, or a certain area, I'll just give up and never go back. If a game annoys me to the point of cursing or even anger, it's not worth it (I should note that this is different from getting excited to the point of cursing. Chu-Chu Rocket had me screaming like a sailor for hours, and I loved every second of it!). I can turn it off and try again tomorrow. If I still get angry at it, then I know I'm not going to finish it. This is entirely independent of how good the game is.

A quick glance at my games on my game rack brings lots of examples to mind.

Mercenaries: Made it to the second Ace. Couldn't capture him alive. Replayed it too much. Never even got to play on the second map.

Gun: Stupid frackin' last boss. In fact, I didn't even play the last part of the game. Jp played it.

GTA: San Andreas: Got bored.
GTA: Liberty City Stories: Couldn't get into it.

Metroid Prime 2: Fish boss killed me too often, and every time I died it was a ten minute trawl back to his location. Nope. Not again.

Punisher: Started something else... damn. I liked that game. Must go back and play it again...

Add to that a list of PC games a mile long, and you see the problem I face any time I consider buying a new game. If I play it, will I enjoy it? Will I finish it? Even if I don't complete it, will I put in enough time to make it worth the price?

Mario Galaxy took up more time in my life for the two weeks after I got it than eating, and arguably breathing, did! Certainly I got far more of a sensorial response playing Galaxy on the Wii than I did with any of my meals during that time!
From start to finish, this is a masterpiece exploding with humour, creativity, intelligence and a level of complexity to make the game challenging without being frustrating. The hardest Stars to get (once more, the goal of the game) are often on the most fun levels to play, so dieing ten times in quick succession doesn't seem so bad! Collecting purple coins on a pixelated Luigi is awesome, but I've lost over 20 lives to it already and still don't have a Star to show for it.

Galaxy is the first game I've really played in a long time. It's certainly the first in a very long time that I have totally enjoyed. Every new level is a thrill, every new Star, a burst of adrenalin. While the big Stars might power the space station, it's collecting the little ones that power me forward. Races, time-trials, quests, and other challenges divert from the platforming for a while and add to the fun. And while I'm talking about platforming, returning to the classic 2D styles in a 3D game without a break in the action is beautiful to watch! Mixing those up with altering gravity fields and mind warping puzzles is just fresh strawberries on an already perfectly iced cake.

There is nothing bad I can say about the game. Sure, the two-player mode leaves the second player with little to do, but Claire loved it while I was Mario, and I loved it while other people controlled the main action. It's not much, but it's damn fun to do! The bosses are colourful and varied, the levels are amazing to play on, and the innovative gravity elements are mind bending to play with. Running around to the underside of a platform to avoid enemies can be confusing at first but you eventually get used t... no. No, you never get used to it! It's amazing every time!

If you have a Wii, you need this game. Mario 64 on the N64 redefined platforming, bringing it into the third dimension. Mario Sunshine was weak, created to fill an unusually long gap between Mario games. But Mario Galaxy is a shining achievement that Nintendo is rightly proud of!

Massive Effects

In my last post I stated that when I do get an X-Box 360:

"I'll get Rainbow Six straight away. Nothing else. I don't particularly like Halo. I have no interest in Oblivion. Assassins Creed looks nice, but not something I'd get on release. That's not to say I won't get other games eventually, just nothing grabs me like this one."

Oh how I lied to you, my readers. There is one other game I will be getting. It'll be long out by then, so I can judge how well it holds up to expectations, but I want Mass Effect. I want this pretty, pretty game so very much.

Which is odd. Because it too is strongly centred on FPS style gameplay. But it is so much more.

My Obsession With Rainbows

Admittedly it's an obsession with the violent, terrorist killing kind, and not the colouredy, "light-spectrum-through-liquid-suspended-in-the-air" kind. Yes, I've started playing Rainbow Six: Vegas. And now it's in my every waking thought, and haunts me in my dreams.

I've never been much of a fan of the first-person-shooter, of FPS genre. In fact, the only time I've really enjoyed myself while playing an FPS was GoldenEye on the N64. Perfect Dark was ok, but just hadn't got the same level of sheer fun I felt playing as Bond. Battlefield I guess is another exception. The ability to drive vehicles, fly planes and crush the opposition beneath the threads of your tank kinda clinches it for me as a fun game. 2142 only goes further with hover tanks and mechs, and that had me sold from the first trailers. But for Battlefield it was always just the multiplayer. I tried the single-player stuff a few times, but I just never got into it. I enjoyed the interaction of player-on-player strategy and the thrill of killing, or being killed by an opponent you know is operating on the same level as you, give or take a bit of skill. We all know the computer cheats. No fog of war, it always knows where you are, precision shooting, perfect tactics. Yawn.

A few weeks back I watched Bob complete a Terrorist Hunt mission on R6: Vegas on the X-Box 360 and I loved it. I watched him die time and time again. From waves of terrorists head on, to sneaky bastards from behind. It was all so cool. My heart was racing just watching him, and if that was the case as a passive observer, I wanted to know what it was like to actually be there, within the playground of destruction, knowing two bullets in quick succession were all that stood between you... well, standing and not!

Last weekend I was over at Bob's place again, and we tried out the split screen multiplayer co-op mode on Terrorist Hunt. The map was Calypso Casino to begin with, the one I had seen Bob playing, giving me a chance to get used to the controls in an environment I (kind of) knew.

First off: Controls. Perfect. A great use of the controller, with the buttons just being where they should be. I grasped everything really quickly, and was nailing terrorist scum in no time. Simple, yet never lacking, the control method makes this game almost a "pick-up-and-play" concept, despite the stealth and infiltration style of gameplay.

Graphics are crisp and clean, even when played on a non-HD TV. Despite some minor graphical glitches that don't hinder gameplay at all, the models and environments are beautiful. Just watching this game is a joy, particularly in the Calypso Casino level, because everything is so bright. You rarely if ever see a gun poking through a door, or get shot from a bullet moving through the corner of a wall. Collision detection is spot-on, and bullets leave marks on everything, blood spatters across surfaces and explosions throw people like rag-dolls.

Enemy AI is fantastic. They circle around once they know where you are. They call for back-up. They try to ambush you at every given opportunity. There are a few exploits available based on the AI. You can step near a door to trigger a zone of influence, then back away and hide to shoot the terrorist that reacts. But when it works, it's such a rush! You shoot at a terrorist behind a corner, but fail to land the fatal wound. He rushes back down the corridor away from you and you suddenly realise in horror that he's trying to circle around through some other rooms! What do you do?!? You only have a few seconds to react. Race in after him, leaving yourself open to assault, or turn and face the other entrance, again leaving yourself open to assault? Usually a hail of bullets from one side or the other will help focus your thoughts, but by then it's often too late. There are a few problems, but they might just be a "handicap" based on the difficulty level we're playing it at. An enemy will race through a door littered with five of his mates without caution. Instead of just leaning over the balcony, an enemy will join you on a nearby rappel line to shoot you. Just little things. It is possible that the enemies are far smarter on "Realistic" mode. Right now, normal is fine for me, thanks.

As I said, I'm not a fan of FPS in general. But I think that I'm just not a fan of the Doom/Quake style of FPS. I thrive on the stealth and strategy of Rainbow Six. I enjoy the slow pace the game takes, the emphasis placed on team-work and co-operation. I love covering a teammate, or knowing that as I advance, there is someone covering me. I enjoy closing doors, considering alternative routes to the target, doubling back to green-light an area or drawing enemies out. I thrill at using "Enemy on your six", "Sniper on the roof", "Cover me", "Reloading", "Go, go, go" and "Whoa, whoa, whoa" and having them mean something. I excite at pressing against a wall, counting down from three and then tapping "A" to open a door, never sure if there is an enemy on the other side. I quicken at seeing the enemy counter reach 8, knowing that this is where we died last time. And I delight in victory, punching the air and relishing the euphoria.

And I love doing nothing. I love feeling my heart pound in my chest as I keep my gun trained on a door to a room that may very well be empty, all because my teammate is blasting terrorist scum at the other door, and might have triggered an ambush. I love the feeling of my finger going numb, poised over the "R-Trigger", ready to flex at less than a seconds notice and unleash 50 rounds from the clip of my P90 in three round bursts into the chests of oncoming opponents.

I never really considered getting an X-Box during it's life. I didn't think about the 360 as a console I might like to own either. I have always been a Nintendo fan. Not necessarily a fanatic. I own a PS2 and love it very much. But Nintendo is my console of choice. It still is. The Wii is an incredible machine. But sometimes I want something different to play. Not "more", or "better", just different. There are games that make you sit up and think "Hey, I want this". Rainbow Six: Vegas is one of those times. I won't be getting it any time soon, I admit, but I will get an X-Box 360 some time this summer, once my exams are done and I have a job again. And I'll get Rainbow Six straight away. Nothing else. I don't particularly like Halo. I have no interest in Oblivion. Assassins Creed looks nice, but not something I'd get on release. That's not to say I won't get other games eventually, just nothing grabs me like this one.

Rainbow Six: Vegas has single-handedly sold me an X-Box 360. Only a few brief outings to Bob's place and I've already unlocked the achievement for killing 500 terrorists. Oh yes! I'm addicted!

EDIT: Just after posting this Noel and I were rappelling down the side of Calypso Casino and some guards came at us from above. They leaned over the railing and expertly placed a not insignificant amount of buck-shot from a Spaz-12 into each of our craniums. I love good enemy AI.

Are You Game?

Check out this cool quiz to see if you are the ultimate computer gamer. I got 82%, a score I am very proud of! Granted, I'll admit that some of them were guesswork, but it was balanced with getting some really easy ones wrong. I can't believe I messed up "who didn't drive in Super Mario Kart?"!! How did I not get that? I've played it to death!

And no cheating. It's all very easy to look up the answers while playing, but that's no fun. Post your scores in the comments if you're interested.

Straying From The Norm

Happy New Year!

Yes, ok, it's a day late, and also the first post since... lets see... November 13th!!

Anyhow, that's all just because I've been super busy. No, no! Really. Stop laughing. I've had a very busy time. Granted, recently "busy" has been defined as "playing Wii", but it still counts! Busy also includes all that awesome work experience I was doing. While it's over now, I 'm looking forward to going back one or two days to cover if one of the other two staff are out sick. I got some really nice Christmas cards from the kids too when I was leaving. Cards and deoderant! Lots of deoderant. Hmmmm...

Back to the Wii. My last post was about waiting for it, and I have since got one, having cued for a little outside Game in Cork on the release morning to be one of the first in the door. I grabbed Zelda (duh!) and Wii Play on the day, and with Wii Sport included and getting Marvel Ultimate Alliance just before Christmas, I already have four games. I really, really want Raving Rabbits. It just looks to be so much fun to play. But I'm not paying €60 for it. Their advertising campaign is by far the best I've seen for any game. I'm not the only person to go from "meh" to "It must be mine!!" based on ads like this alone!

In other news, I quit my job in the lesiure centre. I'm not going to go into why. That's not what this blog is for. For that, you should check out my other blog, One F*£%ed Up Sucky-A$$ed Day. Lets just say I'm happy I've done it, and feel a whole lot better now that I'm free. And jobless. And broke. But at least I can concentrate on my studies! Eh, eh?!? See? See what I did there? I looked for the silver lining. All I found was a slightly whiter area of the "No money" cloud. Well, crap.

Finally, my New Years resolution is to post more often. I really, really want to use this blog. I love writing, and even just writing this stuff is good practice. Feel free to pester me to update if I stop again.

I have more to say, but I have to go to lunch with some friends now. So...

Later!

So Excited I Might Just Wii Myself

Urg... that was terrible! But then again, when I get excited just watching people packing boxes, you know it's obsession.

Oh For Crying Out Loud

I gave you guys the benefit of the doubt when I last complained about the PS3 and Sony, but their new advertising campaign is just ridiculous. Not only does it portray Sony as child abductors using sweet flying "3"s, but come on!! We have all agreed that the PS3 is not a childs console.

$700 people!

Seven Hundred!

And that price, evidently, is because of all those "neato" features no-one that ad is aimed at cares about.

I know the machine can do everything but make you dinner (though if the Nintendo DS cooking game really takes off, who knows!!), but children only see and want a games console. Free from Santa too. With Christmas around the corner, cost is not an issue. It's not like your parents have to pay for the damn thing.

Gaah!!

More Broken Promises

But this time, they aren't from me.

Wednesday morning, at 06:40 Sony Computer Entertainment Europe announced the revised release date of March 2007 for the PlayStation 3 in European and similar PAL territories. They also announced that on release a mere 500,000 units would be split between Japan and Northern America, with only 100,000 of those going to Sony's homeland.

First off, let me say that I am not very surprised by this news. A few weeks ago we learned that the machine had yet to go into production! It hardly seems worth even feigning shock when told this most recent news.

Secondly, as I've stated before in long rambling posts, I'm a Nintendo fan. I'm not an extremist fanboy, I do own and very much enjoy playing my PS2, but I am looking forward to the Wii more than anything else. So feel free to colour this entire article with "Mario Red" tinted glasses.

Well, lets begin. This latest bombshell from the halls of Sony has got to have a massive impact on their own defences. Credibility has been taken a gut wound after promises about the release, the number of available units and the assured success of the PS3 in this very competitive market have been thrown overboard at this late stage in the war.

So how does this actually affect Sony? Stocks are certain to drop in light of the news, or at least will continue to decline as they have been since E3 this year. The sales of the PSP are certain to suffer. Plans to allow link-up features similar to what Nintendo have been promising for the DS would have boosted rapidly declining sales of this handheld. As it stands, the PSP is floundering in the shallow end of the pool, suffering desperately from a lack of ongoing support.

All because they announced a new, later release date for Europe.

But the truth is, we’re used to delays here in Europe. Many movies are still released here weeks after the American screenings, DVDs are worse, games can be delayed by months, and previous generation consoles have been over half a year after the Japan and American releases. And comics! The British “Collectors Editions” of American Marvel comics are up to three years behind in the stories! No. We’re well used to delays. We sit back and savour the opportunity to compare the competition in another market, allowing us the chance to see both flaws and merits of the product in question, be it console machines, movies or fizzy drinks, before we have to worry about making our own purchase. So the delay really isn’t that big a deal. Worldwide releases for consoles are rare due to manufacturing constraints, and we all know that.

What has burned the gaming masses is the lateness of Sony’s announcement. Leaving it until it is so close to the expected date makes the news feel all the worse. Are we to believe that Sony were unaware of the problems and short supply in units until just earlier this week? Are we really expected to accept that the added difficulties of manufacturing the blue diodes only became apparent recently? Actually, no. We've known for a while now of Sony's difficulties with Blue-ray production.

In essence, it is Sony’s arrogance shining through again. The success of the PSOne and PS2 have put Sony in a position that they believe themselves invincible. And for a while they were right. Both machines were great, clearly superior to their competition in many respects. Though I never owned a PSOne, I do have a PS2 and love it dearly. I have owned every Nintendo console since the SNES, and even got a working NES recently. While I will defend them to the last, it is ultimately true that resent Nintendo consoles, specifically since the N64, have suffered from a lack of quantity in games, even if I still believe that, quality based, Nintendo is superior. Over two generations, Sony built up a dominating (and sometimes rabid) fanbase. Where parents used to use the phrase “playing Nintendo” in reference to any console of the 80’s, the parents of the 90’s and new Millenium use “playing Playstation” in the same way. “Playstation” has become the new “sellotape”, “hoover” or (one unique to us Irish) “Tayto”. True as this may be, that does not give Sony the right to treat their customers and fans in the manner they have chosen. But the delay is not the first time Sony has shown a level of superiority and egotism often associated with Hollywood megastar actors.


E3 2006 was a disaster for Sony, and began to hint at problems that have now become clear. Their keynote speech became the butt of a thousand jokes across the gaming public (Riiiiiidge Raaaaaacer!) even before it had finished, clocking in at an excessive two and a bit hours long! Where days before people predicted Sony would dominate the show with dazzling displays of the power of their new machine, now Nintendo and Microsoft were ahead in net-chat statistics. With the 360 already released, the majority assumed Microsoft’s involvement in E3 would be mute at best, silently watching as the unstoppable Sony flexed its muscle. However, a slew of new and interesting games, the announcement of add-ons such as the webcam and the HD drive and a general sense of fun pushed interest in the X-Box 360 to unexpected levels. In contrast to Sony, Nintendo’s keynote speech was packed with information and fun. Of course, things like release date and price point were absent, but the recording of the event proved to be hugely popular on Google Video and gave many their first glimpse of the Wii in action.

The problems continued as Nintendo and Microsoft put out press release after press release of new games, new partnerships and new announcements. Nintendo has built anticipation up to fever-pitch, while the X-Box 360 continues to turn heads with not only its steady flow of quality games but also it’s distinctively designer looking appearance. Many have critisised the PS3s bulky features and, rather interestingly, the controller was changed back to the PS2 style after fans slamed the original new look online. Sony seemed to be making mistake after mistake right from the start.

And what of the PSP? As sales continue to slowly spiral downwards, and the UMD market collapses in on itself, surely Sony were hoping that the connectivity between PSP and PS3 would boost sales for both machines. With a post Christmas release, will people just ignore the PSP in favour of *shock* *horror* a DS and Wii combo? Or forget about handheld fun entirely and get the stand alone power of the X-Box 360? If early rumours are to be believed and a Wii ends up costing as little as €170, a Wii/DS bundle would cost just €320 in total. Half the cost of a PS3! Crazy! Admittedly, I can’t really force myself to believe that one just yet, it’s just too good! But worse case, the Wii costs €250, making a bundle still only €400. That’s cheaper than the release price of the X-Box 360. Double crazy! And that’s with a DS Lite too. Sweet deal.

So what does the PS3 actually have going for it after yesterday’s announcement? The motion sensor added to the controller a few months back is one in their favour. Ok, so it’s true that they are in part just copying Nintendo’s innovative ideas, but in the end it will benefit both companies. As when Nintendo released the N64 controller with a 3D stick and later the Rumble Pak, Sony’s inclusion means that game developers no longer have to worry about the cost of designing a game utilising the technology knowing that their sales can only come from one console. I wouldn’t be surprised to see Microsoft release a controller with some form of similar technology in the near future also, allowing them access to all the same games. No-one likes to get left out.

Left out. That’s what Sony is going to start to feel. Cold. Unwanted. You get the picture. But we should remember that, in the loong run, fans are ultimately hard to hurt permanently, and fanboys are even less likely to hold a grudge passed release. Once everything is released and all the good reviews start rolling in, all this will be forgotten. PS2 owners who were looking forward to the PS3 will consider turning back to familiar territory. Hardcore fans, regardless of the damage they feel now will have the PS3 prebooked long in advance, whatever the ultimate release date. But that may be it. With no Christmas season to buy for, parents are going to be reluctant to shell out for the new machine. Spoilt kids with birthdays around that time might get one, but not many. Be aware, unless Sony drastically changes release trends, the €700 pricetag is for the console alone. Parents will have to pay more for the games unless their little darling really does just want a super expensive DVD player.

Then again, the PS3 is very clearly geared toward the young professional that likes to relax at home after a long day prosecuting criminals, stitching up open chest wounds or working in the leisure industry. But even said young professional will have to put some serious thought into handing over that much cash in one go.

So what does all this mean? Angry fans, annoyed parents, upset youngsters this Christmas, some very happy Nintendo and Microsoft executives... the list goes on.

Sony need to start into some serious damage control. People need to start seeing good things coming after this. Hearing that game developers are abandoning the platform is not a good thing. They need to learn from this mistake also. Waiting this late to announce something you knew weeks, if not months ago is not clever. Staying quiet and hoping everyone will go away is equally not clever. Be a man, Sony! Next time you get a bad report card from your manufacturing team, step up and admit it early. We'll go easier on you. Promise.

Finally, Sony need to read up on their history. As the says goes "a man who does not know his history is doomed to repeat it". Sega thought they were invincible. They released a cutting edge console that failed due to lack of development support. The DreamCast is an awesome machine, with some great games, but there just wasn't enough. And the market at the time could not support three consoles, especially when one was the all consuming PS2, it's biggest advantage being a DVD drive, something Sega just barely missed out on. It's failure directly lead to Sega dropping out of the console development market. Seeing Sony limping in the open grass, away from the other Big Two may cause a hungry and revenge driven Sega to pounce.

So that's it. In the end, I don't think Sony suffer excessively from this delay. They'll get back up, dust themselves off and hopefully chalk this one up as a learning experience. Never, ever promise things you can't deliver. They have left the door wide open for Nintendo and Microsoft to make the most of, stealing as many customers as they can get away with. The PSP may well become a write-off after this, though in truth I think Sony has enough money to pump into it to keep it alive if they so desire.

Now we Europeans have to sit back and watch Japan and America scramble for all those Version 1.0 PS3's. I'm sure we'll all laugh come November 17th when it is revealed that the fan is too noisy, or the transformer overheats. And by the time it hits our shores in 2007, hopefully some of the bugs will have been worked out of the system. And think of the number of games we could get on release date! Most game developers were gearing up for a world-wide release too. Now they can have all those games due to be released from here until March released on the same day!

I'm still not getting one. Roll on the Wii. Excuse me now while I go rearrange my living room to allow for four sets of wildly swinging arms at a decent distance from my far-too-small tv. Thankfully I ungraded from a portable tv last Christmas, thanks to my girlfriend. Now I need a 48" widescreen... hmm... Christmas is happening this year, right? That hasn't been pushed back too, has it?

Additional: Please feel free to comment on any aspect of my writing style, formatting, image useage, whatever! I enjoy honest critisism, even if I blankly ignore you. What to people think of my review in general? Was I objective in my critisisms? I quantiied my bias at the start, but do you think I still showed too much bias against Sony in the article? Any comments at all, as well as just responses are welcome.